4.04.2013

Just when things are going well...

Um ok so you know when you’re feeling really awesome about yourself and your just like “Ok, pat ME on the back because I am handling shit right now. I’ve come through the tunnel with 3 gold stars Super Mario style, feeling better than ever and deserve some serious greatness if I do say so myself ” …?

And then life is like “LOL, hold on a sec”.

Yeah. That just happened to me.

So, despite 4 months of being broken up - 4 or 5 now? I can’t even really remember at this point – anyway, despite being broken up for several months now, I got a text from the ex...

Asking for a date.
Yeah.

Don’t get it wrong, we are on seriously good terms now. We are fully supportive of each other’s endeavors & wishing the most for each’s happiness, and not because I still have some crap in his storage and need him for my hair products. (loosing both of which was a legitimate cause for concern for me during the split)

But seriously, even outside of that, we’re totally cool, genuinely.

Or, so I thought.

Though the breakup was mutual, it seems that the whole “final” part of it wasn’t so much.

It started out as a little joke, holding some of my mail ransom in exchange for a “hangout”. But when he kept pushing for it and I finally said that I wouldn’t be able to just “hangout” with him as if there were never anything between us – I mean, we we’re never “just friends” to begin with – and he said he didn't want it to be just as “friends”, well, it got complicated.

And, surprisingly, emotional. For me anyway.

It nearly broke my heart all over again to have to tell him I couldn’t go back to that with him.

So I cried in my bathroom for a bit, realizing that that part of my life was really over.

Not it a bad way - I'm 99% sure that it was the best thing for me us - but in a "it's really over kind of way". Closure, I think they call it.

And then I told myself to take a breath and stay strong. And get out of the tub because my back would start to cramp. (turning into my mom at warp speed these days)

So I did.

And despite all the emotions, I felt lighter. Better. 

… And then life said “hold on a sec” again, and we lost to the Flyers.

Ugh. (WHHYYYYY?!)


Have you ever had a ex ask you back? How did you handle it?

No comments:

Post a Comment